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Showing posts with label Corporate America. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Corporate America. Show all posts

Entitled and Foolish Children

How Our Enemies Will Defeat Us:
Why is America the most obese society on earth? We are entitled and lazy, arrogant and demanding. We want more than we need, better than anyone else’s, and we want it faster! Which is true of man since the beginning of time; we’ve evolved… We’ve discovered ways to be more efficient, in turn we’ve become more lazy and complacent. Our government needed to be more efficient so that they would still make all the profits. There’s a price to be paid one way or another.

Our society teaches us to pay other people to do the jobs that we don’t want to do: Cleaning, Landscaping, Painting, Farming, and oh yeah, we don’t want to pay them much. People come in from other countries and live here together and pool their money so they can survive and it’s FAR better than where they came from. We call them animals and we bitch because they are taking our jobs. The truth is we ARE NOT willing to live like they live, we ARE NOT willing to work as hard as they do, and we ARE NOT willing to get paid what they get paid. Americans are spoiled and entitled. Jobs need to be done, what we can’t afford to do in-house, we simply outsource.

In America it’s all about smart this and HD that, Wii this and iThat. None of these gadgets are manufactured here; in fact almost nothing is manufactured here. So we are already giving millions of dollars to foreign countries that may or may not have our best interest at heart. We think because we have “trade agreements” they won’t attack us.

They are attacking us. We’re too fat, dumb, and happy to know it, but they are.
Who drives 10 miles to run 5 miles on a treadmill (designed in another country with parts from another country, assembled here) where we can listen to our foreign gadget play digital music and wear our brightly colored foreign-made name brand sneakers and grab a bucket of GMO take-out for the family on the way home?!?  We are so lazy we need a phone that can do everything but wipe our ass for us. But we complain about privacy and pretend to worry about “big brother”. We haven’t got up to change a channel in 35 years and we wonder why our ass has worn a wider divot in the couch cushion.
We are addicted to instant gratification, our muscles are atrophied from lack of use, our necks are sore from texting and we have carpal tunnel from repetitive button pushing. We whine about the aches and pains, but we aren’t willing to actually do anything about it if it requires rigorous movement, exercise or further absence of our almighty convenience. 
So we take a pill.

Another product not manufactured here. This pill is promised to take your pain away. Again, there is a price for everything. Oh, you’re suddenly feeling sad? Try this pill, it will alleviate the sadness, and this one is for the suicidal thoughts associated with taking the pill for sadness, and don’t worry if it gives you muscle pain we have another pain pill for that. Now your legs are restless and your mouth is dry? Take this, it may cause hallucinations, so don’t drink on it, you might have a psychotic episode, but if you do, we have the remedy for that as well. 

“Oh so you’re addicted to the pills? The pharmaceutical company assured us they use only the finest opium from Afghanistan… I can’t see how that could happen, well since you’re addicted now, we aren’t going to give you anymore”. 
Now you are physically withdrawing and the pain has taken over and you will do ANYTHING to get a pill. Word is they are $50 on the street; let’s find one or two… A couple days later you’re sick again, the pain is worse, let’s get 4 this time… now they are too expensive. The guy with the pills says, “hey, I can’t help you with those pills anymore, but give this a shot, you only need a tiny bit; I’ll let you try this bag for free”. Hello Heroin. The progression takes over like a rapidly multiplying parasitic infection.

Incidentally, middle school and high school kids aren’t just smoking pot anymore. It’s too hard to hide from parents who are well versed in 60’s, 70’s, 80’s and 90’s life. Heroin is cheaper and easier to get and to hide… It’s not just in the inner city, it’s everywhere… 14 year olds are giving birth to heroin addicted babies and those babies are being treated with phenobarbital. Once an addict, always an addict; there’s no cure, only treatment.

While one large portion of our Nation is distracted from reality by the most cutting edge gadget, system, game, or device and can’t fathom wasting the effort to walk across the street to a neighbor’s house for coffee; another portion of our Nation is systematically being taken out by a whole new ideal in chemical warfare… created and funded by terrorists, foreign and DOMESTIC. 

As an American you have these rights:
If you don’t want to work, you don’t have to, if you don’t want to feel, you don’t have to, if you don’t want to try, you don’t have to.

In other countries; if you don’t work, you don’t eat.

If any of these other countries decided to attack us today do you think we the people would stand a chance?

Or would you go about your day with confidence, thinking, ‘that’s what the military is there for”? The very military who can’t get adequate care through the VA, the very soldiers who haven’t slept a solid night since their first deployment. The same military men and women treated with the same pills for sadness, and psychiatric issues and pain; becoming addicted themselves?

Perhaps another day with our heads in the sand will make it all go away and the internet will bring more celebrity gossip and grumpy cat meme’s with improved speed and bandwidth for us all. 

Laundry Blog: December 2, 2013

... on Job Hunting in 2013


Dear CareerBuilder, Indeed, Resume Rabbit, Monster, and the rest of the information selling/swapping employment sites:
YOU SUCK. 

I've not had a  single valid lead on employment since joining your site, I've received nothing but SPAM about Male Enhancement, Mail Order Brides, or bogus investment opportunities!



Dear Employers: Have we forgotten that you can learn a great deal about a person in just one well managed interview?? 


The internet has promoted professional malaise. A laziness and disconnect that corporations have adopted by removing the HUMAN from human resources departments worldwide.


Modern Day job applications go like this:
First there is an hour long profile creation that requires a password selection that NOBODY can possibly remember because your password must contain 8 characters, a letter, a number, and upper case, a lower case, it cannot contain your date of birth or phone number, and MUST have at least one special character, but not ! or $ or /... 
Next there is a 42 step log-in process which brings us to the actual online application which takes another hour because it has not populated the data from your resume that you have uploaded in the wrong file format, an hour ago in the first step of the previous profile creation section. 
Now that you think you are ready to consider this 2 hour long application process complete. You're thinking it might be wise to mix a drink before going on to chase the next online listed job opening... 
You realize there is no "SUBMIT" button, only one which says "NEXT". 
So you continue down the rabbit hole to find 500 fill-in-the-dots question and answer  time waster commonly used as a most ridiculous personality profiling tool. Agree/StronglyAgree/Disagree/StronglyDisagree/Unsure...

After 90 minutes of feeling unsure of whether you are agreeing or disagreeing firmly enough or too firmly with regard to the section you're nearly done with, you decide to review your answers as if you were not an exhausted, mentally drained human with need to find a job, but an uppity HR snob whose greatest achievement in life was to remove the payee from her trust fund account when she turned 30. You're emotionally defeated now, judging yourself by the way you feel about shit that doesn't even matter. As you reach for a razor blade to slit your own wrists, you notice a button at the bottom of the screen that says "FINISH" which you triumphantly press wiping the sweat from your brow! 
Long refreshing exhale... look back up at the screen, *** IN RED *** a notification! Scroll to the top, which brings you right back to page one where you have abbreviated the word, "Street" with "St." the system will not accept it. You are swearing at the machine and the system which let you go on for hours in error. So you have to go back and fix all of the listed errors before you can move on. This process repeats 3-4 times before you give up altogether or throw your computer through the window. 


If we have been successful in our efforts, we can now press, "SUBMIT".


"APPLICATION NOT SUBMITTED, You will receive an email shortly"
What the hell...?!? Alas, there it is, an email stating that your application has NOT been submitted, further action is needed on your part. Now we will need to fill out one of those redundant questionnaires that have little to no pertinence to the position applied for. One mustn't forget the 45 minute long skills assessment test. 

Of course, we all must submit a writing sample, DOES THIS ONE COUNT?!?! 

Now the overpaid Cyber Recruiter Monkey with no life skills and a college semester in internet marketing, must check our references, send us for drug tests, make us wait for the results of criminal background checks, driving record checks, body cavity searches, and finally judge us on whether or not we filled out the "optional" identification form...


With no one to follow up with, no information about the position we have just submitted our soul to, there is no way to act upon OUR OWN professional due diligence or plan a next step... Your application, for all you know is floating around in cyberspace never to be read by anyone, you can't retrieve it, you've spent hours to leave your job hunt in the hands of the world wide web.


Three to five weeks later, IF we are LUCKY, Recruiter Monkey will send us an offer letter for $8.00 an hour, 12 hours a week, to hold a sign in front of a local pet store that says, "Puppy Sale Today". 


My fucking head hurts. 
Does anyone wanna buy a kidney? I think selling my own organs along with Beef Jerky and Carnations or even Blowjobs out of a minivan on the side of a road would be less painful and degrading than this!